Symphony of Hammers

In the hazy zone between very late and very early, i walked along the street between Mega A and Mega B. This is contrary to Eric's advice for me to walk to Ortigas and go to EDSA from his place. I'm glad i didn't follow that, otherwise, i would have missed the amazing feat that awaited me between those two parts of SM Megamall.

The place was being fixed, so there are several people up the wall behind the safety nets. The striking of hammers to the walls are nearly chaotic, but far from random. In fact, they make a pattern that has a nice rhythm. Its intricate alternating series of strikes resemble something as beautiful as Ryuichi Sakamoto's Paradise Lost. This experience could probably be resembled by how Lawrence Pritchard Waterhouse mapped out the streets of London in Cryptonomicon. As i slowed down to listen in awe, tears almost escaped my eyes the way it did when i ate a whole portion of wasabi. I thought these things only happen in dreams and could be classified like floating in air. I shouldn't really be surprised by this, tho. Aside from the preference of each worker on when to strike with the hammer would be close enough, the number of people doing this justifies the creation of a pattern coherent enough to resemble music. It's just as fractals -- which is just a randomly generated set of colors -- eventually leads to an image that is similar to a real object.

This experience inspired me to make the composition i've been assigned to do for Belle Ame. They wanted me to make a song that would show my (non)concept of a deity. I'd focus on most people's argument of an "intelligent design," which assumes that everything is part of the "grand design" and that this cannot be possible unless some entity has planned about this. This assumption is apparently flawed, for, save from a few rules, everything is actually ruled by chance and chaos. Poch Suzara explains it better in the mailing-list. This is not enough reason for anyone to be an atheist, as i am, but IMHO, it's good enough for the song.

I still can't think of how to put it in verses this time tho, so i'll just have to update this later.

Dodging People

It seems that i've been dodging people all my life. On the way to the North Avenue MRT Station, i walked opposing a horde of people that are probably on their way home. I walked up, climbing up two steps at a time, avoiding unnecessary steps. Near the top, though, i had to decide whether to take three steps or to take two steps, then step up just one more. I decided to take it slow but sure.

It was still crowded, probably with people rushing their holiday shopping so they won't need to go out tomorrow. After a few minutes, i got into the first car. This, i've done purposely so it'll be close to the stairs that leads to the shops full of pirated CD's in EDSA Central. I asked around if they have VCD's or DVD's of Nightmare Before Christmas or Super-Size Me. They don't have any of those, but they offered me Surviving Christmas, which i haven't even heard of 'til now and i don't think i'd have any interested in watching. I entered Shang, not interested in buying anything there. That mall never fails to disorient me no matter how many times i've been there. It must be their shops with overpriced products, then again, it might just be me, i'm not sure.

A few floors down, and several turns later, i found the exit that's closest to SM Megamall. I went out and headed in the general direction of that great big obstruction. Behind Building B, bodies bounced beside bodies. It's a big crowded mess of people burdened with shopping bags & other stuff that emerge from malls. I turned right and walked thru San Miguel Ave to get to Robinson's Galleria. From the time i set foot in Galleria, i've been thinking twice about watching 2046, but their management already decided for me, by changing 2046 into something else (i can't really remember at the moment). I would've liked to watch it again in that cold movie house, but it's too late now, i have to wait for a VCD/DVD of that. Having lost one purpose of going out, i just looked for Super-size Me and The Nightmare Before Christmas, having checked the shops that sell videos, i lost hope of finding it there and decided to go back to Megamall to look for it.

Just outside the back exit, where Erika drank coffee & Niña gave me iced tea, i decided not to go back from where i came. So i turned left to Ortigas, and saw the front of Gasoline Alley, where Niña and i sat and talk for hours postulating that there's probably a factory that makes people for the sole purpose of delaying her. Seeing that, i decided to go to a place where freedom is given the value it deserves. A place where people hardly respects the restrictions given by the law. A place where love and fear coexists, and are often inseperable. Yes. I decided to go to Virramall.

However, i didn't realize that going there required more effort. Crossing EDSA, i had planned on crossing Ortigas & riding a jeep or a bus from there, but owing it to my poor memory, this plan was sure to fail. There was no place to get across Ortigas for more than a kilometer away. It was too late when i realized this. I've been walking and have been seeing signs that said, "WALANG TAWIRAN NAKAMAMATAY" (this means "no crossing" in a Florante & Laura type of Tagalog). Having seen an overpass made me smile unnecessarily and inexplicably -- since i'd still have to walk to Virramall, given that all public transpo there are full. Having this in mind, i still looked forward to going up and getting across, since the other side seemed to have more lights. To my dismay & puzzlement, the overpass is locked. So i had to walk to the place of freedom on the dim part of the street. A few meters from that depressing event, however, the lights on the other side were also out. I trudged the street knowing that if it weren't for the vehicles passing by, it would've been pitch black, and eventhough it's only a two days before a full moon, i couldn't count on it because of the cloudy sky.

Seeing the green light, my heart pumped as fast as it did when i saw clouds reflecting silver rays of the sun. This was probably because i was so tired, but at that time, it seemed like a good analogy. I went up the overpass where a stream of people flowed against me, probably to get the heck away from that extremely crowded place. It's as crowded as a sardine can stuffed with twice its contents. Despite this fact, i was still determined to look for those two videos. I asked two stalls, which resulted again to the negative. I was then beginning to wonder why those two are so hard to find. After a few minutes, i decided that i didn't care why it is, as long as i find it. I also realized something else: that i didn't know how i could get to Virramall from that part of the shopping center. Rather than going in circles again, i decided to go out and head for Virramall's entrance. On the way, i saw the cinema and checked, just in case they're showing 2046 there, which of course, they're not. That, having wasted my time, made me get to Virramall's entrance more than a few moments since it closed. It wouldn't have mattered anyway, since most of the pirates leave at least half an hour before the mall closes, which led me to wonder what stupid thought came into my mind that implored me to go there in the first place.

Fretting over something that's already done is useless, i know, so i decided to solve my problem by making a time-machine. However, i had more urgent problems to deal with -- such as getting home -- so i decided to set aside that endeavor and get going. I turned right from the gate of Green Hills Shopping Center to Annapolis. After that i decided to walk to Cubao, just for kicks. Of course, i had to nourish my poor body before another torturous activity, so i grabbed a Pork Asado Crunch-pao (like Kung-pow, only crunchier) and some juice at a MiniStop near a condo named Atlanta Center. I continued where i left off with Poppy Z. Brite while eating. Going out of that store, i turned left. After a few meters, i drew a map in my head. I realized my walk would've been shorter if i turned right instead, and go thru Eisenhower then Rd 1 & Rd2. I wouldn't know where to go from there, but i'm certain it'll get me to Aurora faster. Thinking that i could always do that again next time, i continued to EDSA.

Seeing that the MRT cars are jam-packed, i said to myself that i'm doing the right thing by walking. In front of PNP's white gate that are as tall as three humans on top of eahc other, i saw a couple apparently arguing who gets the next piece of fishball, or at least that's what i thought. Just before getting to Serrano Avenue, i saw two groups of guys, which looked like people who are out to get my non-existent cellphone, but they didn't even noticed me, so it's just paranoia in my part.

Away from the Bagong Crame area, i discovered the land that MMDA forgot. It's probably covered in a mile radius from Bangbangali. From there, i could see the Cubao MRT station. Going up two steps at a time, i recalled that my ticket only has 10.50 PhP loaded in it. At the ticketing booth, i verified that it'll take me 10.50 PhP to get to the North Ave station from there. With a mild stroke of senselessness, i came up with an idea that'll attempt to justify the absurdity of my current situation. I decided to go to the next station (GMA Kamuning) and explain to people that i walked all the way there to get a bonus ride worth 50 centavos -- because, with a stored value ticket, the last ride wouldn't account how much was left on your card. Also, i decided to explain thinking this way because i'm of Ilokano (who are considered kuripot -- to put it nicely: extremely thrifty -- all over the country) origin. However, the fact that i'm writing this on a public web log made this decision nonsensical.

I took the first car of the MRT again because the other two were full. I didn't want a seat tho, just more place to move around.

I staggered down, one or two steps at a time, invariably, at the North Avenue Station. When i got to the foot bridge, i took one tiring step at a time, then walked very slowly on top, then down a step at a time. After a few minutes of regaining my strength, i got down two steps at a time like before.

It was surprising to see SM North still open after 10pm, so i got in and tried for one last time to look for The Nightmare Before Christmas & Super-size Me, but the video shops are closed. Passing by, i bought a brownie & iced tea, or "number one" as they called it, at some store. Eating while walking, i saw a music store and decided to buy a bass pick. To my dismay, the store was also closed.

I walked thru the parking lot and crossed the street at a part where nobody else would probably cross. I found a trash can near the back exit of Supersales club, threw my garbage and continued to walking my almost-daily path. After a few hours of senseless torture, here i am, with nothing gained but another look at a small portion of the world. Still the same, more or less. Still climbing up and down flights of stairs two steps at a time. Still dodging people.

Belle Ame 2004

We arranged Dianne the whole day, when zery realized that he did something wrong, of which i have no liberty to discuss, but it would suffice to say that this mistake might require major revisions in our part.

Members:

ais

vocals

iori

drums

rency/taki

rythms

yume

bass

zery

lead guitars

Playlist: for February 2005

1. Haruka Kanata
2. (Slamdunk or Naruto Soundtrack)
3. Dianne - written by zeri

UHF Week 3: Christmas party

A week after my certain shade of green

It's been a week since the KSP Medical/Dental Mission in Antipolo (photos here). That's when i watched a Wong Kar-wai movie, 2046 with Blossom, Rio (or was that Emmy), Erika, and Niña. The movie was great (as should be expected), that i found myself dumbfoundedly staring at the screen several times.

That night, i waited with Niña outside Galleria, in front of Gasoline Alley facing an Enteng Kabisote poster. It was great. We had conversations about almost everything we could think of talking about. Well, given the fact that we waited there for three hours, this shouldn't come much as a surprise, but this experience made me so happy. After a few hours, we bought a couple of Vodka Cruisers, and waited for her dad instead, to pick her up. I'm really glad this happened, cause she's now an email-pal. Talking with Niña gives me a certain happiness that can only be equaled by me playing my bass, or finishing a software project where i play a major part. We've been chatting or emailing each other almost everyday since then, and i hope i get a chance to see her and actually talk to her again.

UHF Week 2: Love of self - correct use of our talents

We realized more problems this week than we did last week. This is probably because we were more prepared and there were more children this time.

What we did was relatively easier, though. We let them watch a movie (Spiderman), and let them make masks of their own superhero. The movie became quite taxing, and they become more and more restless. However, they behaved themselves in no time when an older kid was assigned to hand them food.

The mask thing really worked, however. Everyone participated, and some were even eager enough that they made more than one mask. It really helped that we've separated our tasks and we've prepared for this. We mixed in with the kids asking them stuff while they were working to lighten up their mood.

Kilusang Sagip Pilipinas

KSPilipinas was organized as a reaction to one UP report claiming that the Philippines is in a deep crisis and is lagging behind the rest of the world. KSP, being newly formed, needs a lot of support most specially from the populace. The organization aims to help the the nation to get back on track by mostly civic projects. please register at forum.kspilipinas.org and help dessiminate the info. Should you decide to be a part of this movement, it would be helpful[this is not obligatory or anything] if you could pledge any help for upcoming projects and civic work.

UHF Week 1: Love of self - believing in yourself and in your dreams

This was the first time we met the kids, so i was nervous and excited. Too excited that i got confused as to where i should meet my groupmates, but that's another story.

Sitting in front of The Catacombs, i got to talk to Jereyyan (who later, i realized was older than me). He was telling what they usually do there, and how often he goes there. When the others came, Jereyyan was already busy.

Inside, together with the kids, we arranged a few tables and chairs for us to sit. We told them two stories. One about "Putot," a dog with a short tail that he doesn't appreciate. Another one, about "Dindo Pundido," a firefly with no light. It was quite easier than we expected. They were paying attention to us, and even crowding up close to the one telling the story. This was probably because the reading was made "interactive," in that they get to say what they want more than once each page.

Also, most of them are really active, and someone even volunteered to read. We encouraged the others who weren't participating to pitch in, and say what they want. A few of them though, where a bit aggressive towards each other, but seemed like they just want some attention, so we let them grab the spotlight for a few minutes, impressing us with their talents.

After that, we let things simmer down a bit, and made them draw up somethings, which they did, without hesitation. One possible problem is that we're not too sure they've grasped the lesson we're trying to impart on them cause we didn't have enough time to ask them what they got from us.

Here are the images of their works:

SA; KSPilipinas; FEU-FERN; phone:cut | DSL:ok

Just started my SA tasks, and they were impressed at my skills of making presentations (that's the first). Actually, i'm still not really legit to do any Student Assistant duties, but my instructor told me that we'll just ante-date what i did. Anyway, i was there from 9-10, then 1-3:45, so i already have almost four hours. It wasn't at all that fun, but it wasn't really dull either. I get to practice my "office productivity suite skills" and i get to read all the basic fun Math stuff that i've seen, but didn't really enjoyed, in high school.

Around 6 pm, I was in Shang. Then, 30 minutes later, went to Starbucks to wait for Eric (Enrico Leonor, to be precise) and some other people from KSP (Kilusang Sagip Pilipinas). At around 7:20, i met Eky and Nina (kewl! i remembered their names). Anyway, chatting with them verified that KSP is not some leftist stuff that will try to "rescue the country through [insert -ism here]." It's not that i'm totally against it, but as of now (and probably several generations hence), their recommendations just aren't effective, feasible, tolerable, or even logical. Eky told me that KSP's site's already finished, so there's probably no reason for us to meet in the first place, but it was fun. Anyway, I enjoyed talking to them, so it was worth the time meeting up with them. Erica (eky) gave me the URL of their sample site.

However, getting home's another story. Around 10:30, i said goodbye to Nina and Eric (Eky went with her folks before we finished), and went up to ride the MRT, which, to my dismay, just had its last ride pass by. So i rode the bus to SM North, and walked the usual dangerous-after-ten route i usually take.

At home, my folks told me that the phone line's cut, but i could still connect to the internet using DSL, so i don't really care 'bout that right now.

As for our project with FEU-FERN (Mindworks), Patrick said it was "shelved." I don't know what he meant by that, but AFAIK, we don't need to work on it as long as it's still shelved. It's both a disappointment and a relief. I want to finish what i started, but i think i made too many commitments that i couldn't possibly get all of them done unless something gives.